Nanni (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
tiamatschild) wrote2010-01-21 06:23 pm
tiamatschild) wrote2010-01-21 06:23 pm
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Okay! The frightening, intrusive thoughts can stop any moment now! I would be totally cool with that! You know what else I would be cool with? The feeling of free floating panic! That too can leave at any time, I mean, I don't need a hug and kiss good bye, I'm not going to be worried that I am a boring host visited only because of social convention so really there's no pressing need to wait on me, just show yourselves out...
The strange thing is that if I overheard somebody talking this way about anyone else, I would categorically reject the discourse, and have plenty of articulate reasons for doing so. But when it's me talking to me I have so much trouble shutting it down and not believing it, even though I don't in fact believe any of the basic premises behind this nonsense. It's really exhausting.
The strange thing is that if I overheard somebody talking this way about anyone else, I would categorically reject the discourse, and have plenty of articulate reasons for doing so. But when it's me talking to me I have so much trouble shutting it down and not believing it, even though I don't in fact believe any of the basic premises behind this nonsense. It's really exhausting.